We may not tell you (our readers) how awesome you are enough. That’s right. YOU! Parents and teachers, we are so glad that you have stopped by The Educators’ Spin On It to read our articles on parting and educating children. You really are wonderful and doing a great job interacting with your children, making every day moments, learning opportunities and we feel fortunate to be part of your day! We are by no means “the experts” rather dedicated parents with an enthusiasm for sharing what we have learned with others. In fact, we learn so much from our friends online and in-person too.
I recently connected with Tarana via Twitter and appreciated her honest, hands-on approach to parenting. She is the kind of mom that I feel would accept my parenting successes (and failures) in stride without judgement. I adore her positive outlook on making the best of parenting and asked if she would like to share more with you as part of our parenting with purpose series!
Six Ways in Which I Became a Better Parent
By Tarana, author of Sand in My Toes
I may have had many thoughts about the kind of mother I would be before my son was born. Once he entered my world, though, all of them vanished. It wasn’t a conscious decision, to focus only on each moment at a time. I just wanted to do what felt right to me, without being told what I should be doing. I’ve never read a parenting book, and I can’t say I’m the perfect parent, but I’m happy with my decisions. Here are some ways in which I think I became a better parent:
Trusting my instincts
There are all kinds of experts who will offer advice like there is no alternative. But there is always a choice – to do what’s best for your family. Sometimes, even the advice of well-meaning friends may not work for you. That’s when you should remember to trust your instincts which tell you which way to go. This has always worked for me when going through the challenges that parenting brings with it.
Listening to my child
Nothing can help you understand your child better than by just observing their cues. A baby can teach your more than any book can. A schedule based on your child’s patterns will be met with the least resistance. I looked at my baby for signs of tiredness, hunger, or discomfort to decide what to do. For instance, it didn’t matter that he wanted to feed every hour, as long as he was content.
Doing my research
Not everything can be answered by instinct. There are some questions, such as weaning or potty training, which require detailed research. The thing to remember is to be careful about the sources of your research, and not be misled by websites (or forums) which spread misinformation.
Note: Use the library, parenting section in book stores and recommendations from friends. Here are three we’re reading right now. Amazon Affiliate Links: ~ Amanda
Finding time for myself
Even a little time to yourself can make a difference. Sometimes, you can even have ‘me time’ with your baby around! Like exercising, or reading, or just going out for a walk. I think spending some time every day doing what I liked made me a happier mom.
Making room for mistakes
Parenting guilt is a bad thing, and yet, it is inevitable. You will make mistakes, even if you are not a first-time parent. Allow yourself to be human, and don’t beat yourself about doing something you didn’t mean to. Forgiving ourselves is important towards teaching our children about forgiveness and respect.
Not making comparisons
I knew that I could only be the kind of parent that I am. It’s always easy to find another mom who seems to be doing a ‘better job’ than you, but she doesn’t know your child like you do. Only you can understand the needs of your family, so have confidence in your decisions. I think being secure in the knowledge that I am doing the best I can as a parent has helped me a lot. It doesn’t mean that I don’t make mistakes, but I am open to learning and evolving as a mother. There’s no right or wrong in parenting, as long as you have a happy child.
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Tarana Khan is mom to a toddler, living an expat life in Dubai. She loves writing and has done her stints as a copywriter, reporter and content editor, before embracing parenthood full time. She blogs at Sand In My Toes, where you can drop by to read more of her parenting and other adventures! You can also catch up with her on Twitter, Facebook, Pinterest or GooglePlease stop by to read her additional parenting articles:
For more Parenting with Purpose articles here at The Educators’ Spin On It, we recommend:
Tarana Khan says
June 3, 2014 at 10:30 amThank you for featuring me, and the lovely introduction by Amanda!
Pamela L (Rookie Parenting) says
August 29, 2014 at 12:13 pmTarana, awesome article. You're an amazing mom!
Tarana Khan says
August 30, 2014 at 10:07 amThanks, Pamela!
Anonymous says
November 13, 2014 at 11:33 pmI am a mommy of a 3.5 year old and a 3.5 month old who exists in a consistent state of sort of managed chaos. When I saw the title of this article I was totally prepared to feel like a failure by the time I got to "Way #2". Instead I breathed a sigh of relief when I could totally relate to what I suspected you may have experienced to reach this level of understanding. I'm so glad I found this post. It really gave pause to my chaos for a moment. 🙂
Tarana Khan says
November 15, 2014 at 2:51 pmI hope I never make another mom feel like a failure! I'm sure you're a fantastic mother, and so glad to hear that this post made you feel a little better.